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kyyrandi: (snafu)
Tuesday, February 19th, 2013 08:49 pm
... and on the good writing days nothing else matters.”
-Neil Gaiman
“Being a writer is a very peculiar sort of a job: it's always you versus a blank sheet of paper (or a blank screen) and quite often the blank piece of paper wins.”
-The same

Those two quotes pretty much sum up everything that's been going on for me for the past few days. Mostly I'm glad of the steady headway I'm making with the fic that I'm currently working on, but at the same time, I'm a bit miffed that I went from getting nearly 2K done in one day, to just barely breaking a thousand in the next three combined. Oh well.

At least next week is the winter break around here, meaning that I have a whole week to spend doing nothing but writing, if I so wish.

Or well, not the whole week. Since at some point in there, I do need to spend some time hitting the books as well. By which I mean that I've started cramming for the entrance exams to get to Uni. I'm trying to get in the University of Tampre, either to study English literature, filology and translation or Social Sciences. The first one has already announced their exam books (which is great, because there's three of them) but the other won't do that until April.

The book that I'm reading right now is called The Study of Language, by George Yale. So far I'm really liking it, it's really well and interrerstingly written and easy to grasp. Luckily that one is also the only one of the books that need to be studied from cover to cover. So that helps. The two others are book called Ways of Reading by Martin Montgomery et al, which focuses more on literature, where as the first one is more about filology.

A friend of mine who got in the same place and had to study the same books a couple of years earlier, said that Montgomery's book is maybe a bit more boring of the two. Then again, I'm much more interested in studying literature, where as she gets exited about things like phonetics and syntax, so I might not feel quite the same about this. We'll see.

Anyway, the last book is Introducing Translation Studies by Jeremy Munday. It's the only book I don't have yet, so know idea what it's going to end up like. But I'm really hoping it's a good one as translating is one of the areas I'm seriously considering focusing on if I get in, (the others are teaching and minoring in journalism.)

The exams won't be before the end of May, start of June, so thankfully I still have plenty of time. For now I'm trying to keep to a scheduale of studying for two hours every week day, and three to four on Saturdays.

In hockey news: The Wild beat the Red Wings! And it was really awesome! Zucker scored his NHL first! Kuemper got his first NHL win! In total, they had five rookie in the line-up! And Granlund is on a three game point streak!

I kind of hate this team, because just when I'm starting to give up on them and resign to them not winning anything ever - and that's okay, I'm Finnish, we've been raised to expect our teams to suck always, so much so that we don't know what to do with ourselfs if they don't and go batshit insane - and then they do something like this.

And then I get exited about the team again, only to have all hopes squashed all over again soon enough. (And why do I always cheering for teams like this! It's not just the Wild, I just described my SM-Liiga team's whole season too!)

It's just exhausting is all. Either suck, or don't. Do you have to do both?

Also, keeping up with my favorite topic ever. By which I mean rookies and unrealistic expectations placed on them. A while back, I was reading a finnish hockey forum, and happened to a thread about the Wild's rookies. And in there, some complete asshat, compared Brodin to Niklas Lidström of all people. I mean what the hell? Why would you do that?

We are talking about a 17 year old kid here! And you are hailing him as the "next greatest defenseman ever" already? How is that anything but setting him up for a failure?

kyyrandi: (snafu)
Friday, January 18th, 2013 12:28 pm
At school at the moment.

What I should be doing: a nearly 30 page work sheet on food poisonings and different kind of microbies that cause them.

What I'm actually doing: procrastinating online, because after being at it for almost three hours, I'm fed up with the differencies between aerobic and anaerobic bacteria, or what kind of environment each kind requires.

Isn't it enough that I remember to always wash my hands?

.. Honestly, I usually like microbiology, and as far as our theoretical subjects goes, it might just be the best, but god I need a break.

Thankfully, someone reminded me of this:

The whole reason for Eurovision to exist: where else would we get our musical crack from.
kyyrandi: (Default)
Sunday, November 18th, 2012 05:17 pm
Seems like I accidentally ended up taking a mini-hiatus from blogging. Mostly because life got kind of crazy  in a lot of ways. I had a mid to bad depression period and ended up missing school for a month, plus two weeks of sick leave, but now, thanks to some adjustments in my meds and also after re-structuring my life a bit, things are starting to look up a bit again.

I ended up not being able to change school, because the place I would've tried to get in didn't have any spots open, but I'm surprisingly fine with that. I talked things through in my current school, and we worked out a new class schedule for me, so my work load is much smaller until the christmas break, I have Wednesdays off completely and I'm also spending two days a week interning instead of going to school, which is something I've always preferred. Also, the internship place is really nice, it's a kitchen of a local old folks home, the staff is really great and since it's a pretty small place, it isn't super crazy busy all the time.

So assuming I can keep this up, I'd maybe be able to graduate sometime in the next fall, which while not ideal, as I originally it should've been next spring, is still better than what it seemed when things were at their worst. It also helps that I've really gotten a lot of my motivation back, the lack of which was a big factor in why I was struggling with school so much in the first place.

That said, I am planning on re-applying to schools in the spring also. I've already started prepping a little for the entrance exams for uni. I've wanted to study english and literature for so long, that at the very least I need to try and see if I have a shot at making it happen.

Finally, to the very best of things to have happened while I was busy not blogging: KÄRPÄT ARE NUMBER ONE IN SM-LIIGA STANDINGS!!! That hasn't happened since something like 2008! The team has completely transformed from the crap-fest that was the begging of the season to an actual contender. The goaltending has, as unlikely as that seemed just a few months ago, become top notch, and the team is just clicking. They have the least goals against, by a pretty nice margin at that, and are number two in goals scored! At this rate, we might even have a shot at a championship this spring!

And they've done this, even though the team keeps having injury problems. I think at this point, at least three or for players are or have been on IR because of concussions, plus a whole list of other injuries. Honestly, at this point it feels like trying to keep up with whose out with what is a wasted effort.

All of which leads to me continuing to feel conflicted about the lockout. Seeing as for all that I really want to see NHL being played sometime this season, just the thought of losing our lockout NHLers makes me sad. I actually have the confidence in the team, and I think they'd do just fine with out the NHLers, since a lot of other players have been stepping up and improving, and so losing them probably wouldn't lead to an immediate clusterfuck, but there's no denying that they make the team better.

Especially Demers, who I just can not gush enough about. He's just such a huge presence on our blue line, plays 25+ minutes night in, night out, is third in the team in points scored and second in plus/minus. He's arguably the best defenseman in the entire league right now. Not to mention that he seems to like being here, fits well with the team and all the other players always talk about how well liked he is in the locker room. He's even learning finnish!

Aand that's probably enough gushing for now. 
kyyrandi: (Default)
Thursday, October 18th, 2012 08:49 pm
Friend-of-a-friend friending meme of doom! // Right this way!

For starters, welcome to all my lovely new friends, and a warning: I ramble. A lot. Hopefully you'll bare with me. :)

So I may or may not have mentioned this this earlier, but about three years ago, I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder. I'm much more prone to depression (which, I was diagnosed and hospitalized with for the first time when I was sixteen) and I've never really had a pure manic episodes in my life. Instead I've had quite a few hypomanic episodes, which are basically just a slightly more moderate version of the same. And even more than those, I've had a lot of mixed affective episodes, which is sort of like being manic and depressed at the same time.

Understandably this has caused problems in quite a few areas in my life, one of them being school. I mean when something as simple as getting out of the bed feels like an insurmountable obstacle, going to school day in, day out is sometimes completely impossible. Which has grown into a really huge problem this fall.

I'm on my last year in the school I'm currently at, and if I wanted to be able to graduate this spring, as I should, I not only couldn't miss so much as a one day in school, but I'd also have to work through every holiday break we get between here and then, plus quite a few weekends also.

All this has been piling up and adding to my stress levels, and so for the past month or so, I've been stuck in this ever worsening nightmare, where I'm not going to school because I'm having a depression episode and because I'm not going to school and constantly stressed about it, making my depression even worse.

And then this weekend, I was talking about schools with a friend of mine, and he mentioned the school he went to, and I realized that it's the perfect out of this hellish dead end I've ended up in. See, the school he went to, and to which I have a change of transferring to, is one, that specializes in helping people who have learning impairments for different reasons (for example, the friend who I spoke of it with, has ADHD).

So if I could get in, I could do the same degree I've been working on for two years now, instead of dropping out, or delaying, because I'm on a verge of needing a prolonged sick leave, if nothing changes soon, but do it in a manner and schedule, more suited to my current condition.

Also, if I got the transfer, I'd also get to move cities, a definite plus on so many levels. For one, I'd be moving to Tampere, where most of my friends, and one of my sisters, live and where I'm so much more comfortable than where I currently live. It's also the city where my trans process is happening, so moving would make that so much more easier as well, since I would have to sit in a train for two hours in one direction every time I have an appointment. Plus, I just don't like the city I live at the moment, and have wanted to move away from here for more than a year now, but haven't been able to, because of school.

And just like that, I feel like I'm slowly starting to claw my way back into health once again. Or as close to it as I'm ever going to get.

As for the other stuff mentioned; I'm trying to decide whether or not I should get tickets for the Karjala Tournament played in Turku in a couple of weeks. For those on my flist not familiar with European hockey, the Karjala Tournament is the first part of Euro Hockey Tour, played between Finland, Sweden, Russia and the Czech Republic during the regular season and leading up to the Worlds, which each country hosting a round-robin Tournament. No league games are played during the tournaments.

For the most part the EHT is consider as practice for the Worlds/Olympics, as well as a change for younger players to show the coaching staffs that they deserve a roster spot in their national teams. For one, there has already been some speculation about Barkov (the top Finnish prospect at the next years draft) maybe suiting up for our national men's team for the first time ever, which would be awesome to see.

All in all, it'd be a great change to see team Finland play live, and at a quarter of the cost that waiting for the Worlds in the spring would be. The only problem is that I'm currently pretty much broke, and even the 20 or so euros for the tickets, plus train rides there and back, might mean that I won't have any money for food next month. So.. Food, or hockey?

On the next chapter in my teams goalie situation, wherein everything is starting to get somewhat hilarious. Not only is does our "back-up" goalie have a better save percentage and goals against average (AND more shutouts, not that that's hard since Backlund is yet to record even one) than our "number one", he's also in the league top 3 in all of the previously mentioned categories, where as Backlund isn't even in the top 15 in save percentage, and is something like eight or night in GAA. And they are even in wins, with Karhunen having played in one less game.

So our back-up is better than our number one, but for some reason our couch won't face up to it, officially at least, although it's starting to feel like he does a coin toss or something, before each game to see which one will be playing, and all of it is just so very confusing.

On the plus side, Kärpät have finally started to slowly climb their way back up, after the disaster that was the start of the season, and are now third in the standings, so there's that at least.
Although I am somewhat afraid that should the lockout end, that they'll come crashing down again, since that'd mean losing Demers (who, btw, I've really come to like, but why oh why, is he a fraking Shark), who has been a real difference maker for us, especially on the PP, not to mention Turris, after which, with the current injury list a mile long, we'd be effectively without a first AND second line center. Fun times.

I'm all for NHL coming back, but oh do I ever wish that it wouldn't mean losing Demers. It's not that he's been a great player for us, but I've also really grown to like him and seeing him play with Kärpät.
kyyrandi: (Default)
Friday, June 29th, 2012 03:37 pm
My summer holiday started! A month and a half, during which I have to do absolutely nothing at all! I so very much needed it. What with working my ass off all through last summer, and then having a basically the worst year off school ever, completed with a spring of doing 12+ hour days of work and school for almost a month, I've been pretty much on a constant verge of a burnout from at least mid-May now.

But finally today I got to clean out my locker and walk out of there having caught up with all my missed classes and not have to think about going there before August. Hopefully it'll be time enough to gain back some of my motivation for even going there, since that has been the biggest problem for me the whole year. I mean at this point I'm somewhat certain that I really don't want to be a cook for the rest of my life, and that at the end of the day, it's a shitty, underpaid, over-worked profession with crazy hour. But at the same time, I only have a year at the school left. Less than that, if I stop fucking around. That really shouldn't be such a hardship. And then I'll graduate and have an actual profession, which even if I just end up going back to school to study something else, should make my life somewhat easier.

Of course, if I'm being totally honest, while the thought of doing fuck all sounds amazing right about now, I'll probably be going stir crazy from boredom in about a week. And what better way to avoid that, than to make a huge ass list of things to write about, so at no point in time can I truthfully claim, that I can't think of anything to do. So far, these include

1) Finishing the Finnish Hockey History primer, something I'm hoping to get done by the end of this week, once I really get going with it

2) Finnish Hockey primer, Players edition. This should be pretty easy one, since quite a lot of them will get their own primers some time in the future, and as such don't have to be covered in any great detail at this point. Mostly I'm having a problem with deciding on how to group them. By age? When they started playing? By what position they play? What teams they play on? There are just too many possibilities!

3) Those individual primers I just mentioned. Kind of dreading this one actually. For one thing, there's somewhat of a shortage of recourses to use, at least as far as videos and interviews in English go. Like Kari Lehtonen for example. Possibly my favorite Finnish goalie ever, but with one or at most two English vids of him out there, what exactly is there that can be used to make a complete separate primer with? You have to go on page six on a google image search to get pictures of him in which he's not all covered up in padding! (Yes, I checked.) Although, for the sake of my sanity, it might be a good thing there's not more close-up pictures of his face out there. It's not as if I have ever watch him give an interview and then realizing around half way through that I've missed most if not all of what he has said, because I was too busy staring those beautiful eyelashes of his.. I CAN'T HELP IT, THEY'RE DISTRACTINGLY LONG AND THICK AND PRETTY AND HOW IS THIS NOT THE PRETTIES SIGHT EVER..
Ahem. Where was I? Right, the primers. Another problem with these individual ones is that I have absolutely no idea how to make up my mind on the order in which to do them. I mean, sure, Tuomo Ruutu will be the very first one, no questions about it, what with being my favorite player since as long as I can remember, but as for the rest of them? From what I've seen, Tuukka Rask seems to be kind of popular name in the fandom right now, so there might be quite a lot of intrest to see a primer on him. Mikko Koivu always needs more love. Mikael Granlund enters the race for the Cutest Child on Ice title once the season starts, so obviously he's going to need a primer.. Somehow I'm starting to feel that getting bored won't really be the problem.

4) General primer on Finland and Finnish culture. I blame this solely on [personal profile] intertangled who is an enabling enabler who enablers. Truthfully, this is the one I'm least likely to ever make. I only have the one month and a half off after all. At some points I would possibly like to do things like sleep and eat, instead of writing about how we are all crazy. But just in case I get a super crazy writing flow going on and finish everything else, I'll list this one too.

Of course, there is the primer exchange challenge over at [ profile] hockeypedia that I'm planning on signing up for, which will probably effect this listing somewhat. I'm really kinda super exited for it to begin.

So since I already mentioned Tuomo Ruutu why not continue with that. See the thing is, for some time now, my reactions on whose on the national team roster at any given tournament has been either a "yes Ruutu made the team, thank you hockey gods, everything is right in the world" or a "what you mean he's not on the team, why must he be injured, it's all wrong, and nothing will ever be good again, and I shall go now and cry." He was on the team last year, we won gold; this year he couldn't make it and we got nothing. OBVIOUSLY THIS WAS THE DECIDING FACTOR.

My love for him knows no bounds. Sort of murdering some one, I don't think he could ever do anything wrong in my eyes. Even then I'd probably try and find some way of justifying his actions. Except for one thing. He plays for the Carolina Hurricanes. And having signed a contract extension this year, he's going to continue to play with them for some time. I really don't have anything against the Canes as such. I just don't know anything about them, beyond that they have baby-Skinner, and are amassing a clone Staal army. But nevertheless, the presence of Ruutu on the team has somehow resulted in me watching countless Canes videos and kind of sort of maybe following a blog about them, and all of this is making me feel like I'm Stockholming myself into liking the team. THIS IS NOT GOOD, AND I SHOULD STOP! SOMEBODY HELP ME.

When did this become my life?