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Wednesday, October 24th, 2012 05:40 pm
 So my first appointment at the Trans clinic in Tampere was yesterday. All in all, it went well enough, for all the stressing I did before-hand.

I did manage to almost be late for it though, because my sense of direction is shit, and Tampere University Hospital (where the clinic is) is huge, and the clinic is hidden in a separate building, in what at least felt like, the farthest corner of the area. And when I say hidden, I really mean hidden; all the direction sign, which there weren't too many off, only listed the place by it's building letter, and the words 'trans outpatient clinic' could only be found on the building door, and even then, they were so small, no way could anyone tell that, unless they were standing right in front of the door (where as all the other wards and clinics in the same building where listed with much bigger font.)

Now, I get that there are issues of privacy and all that, but it just felt a bit too much. And at least to me, all that hiding made it feel like this is something one should feel somehow ashamed of.

But beyond the somewhat troublesome placement, the clinic itself was real nice. My appointment for yesterday was for a nurse, who was perhaps one of the nicest medical personals I've ever met. Mostly this first appointment was about the reasons for getting into the process as well as previous (mental) health history.

I've been somewhat worried, that because of my underlining mental issues, my process would be hindered, or stopped all together, but yesterday put a lot of that to ease. I'm still not 100% convinced that at some point someone won't say that I'm too unstable to go through such huge life changes, which, btw, would be completely bullshit, one of the reasons I've waited so long to start this thing, was so I could be sure enough, that I'm as balanced as possible, but I did get the feeling that my own opinions and feelings on the matter are heard and respected.

Like I mentioned earlier, my next appointment will be in December. That one will be with a social worker, and oh man, I couldn't be dreading that one any more. Because the point of the appointment is to go through one's family history, as well as any other major relationships in one's life, past and present. And it's the family history part of that I'm not so exited about. Because it's complicated enough that good part of the past two years I've spent in therapy have been about untangling the mess in my head. The letter I got said to reserve two hours for it, but somehow I think I wont survive in just that. Although from what I've heard, it's not exactly uncommon for that appointment to run longer anyway.